Hey Guys,
I had an email from Sarah highlighting some thoughts she had. I will post it here as it may help.
Hey Charlie,
first something I have noticed:
You should decide how to translate "you"
In german we have two Options, depending on how well the people know each other
I saw the Press-Interviewer first saying “Sie/Ihr” (which is the polite form when they don’t know each other) in the next text sayin “Du/dir/dich” which is the form to use when they know each other better and in the last text (the tanks for your time text) back to the polite form.
Also, theres an inconsitent writing of “du/dir/dich”, sometimes it is written small and sometimes capitalized.
Both is correct, but it looks a bit… weird… if it is inconsistent in two sentences that are in the same box.
I think I have a couple of situations in the screens I will attach.
Also, the Researchpoints are marked as UP when they are shortened which makes no sence. FP would be okay, since “Forschung” is used for research. I am thinking since yesterday about that and don’t find any reason how “UP” came up.
Attached will be 25 Screens, at least I hope I can attach all of them to this mail. If you additionally need to know where these screens took place just let me know so I can add that.
I have marked the parts that are wrong, what exactly is wrong will be written below this sentence.
GDT_Bugs: better would be "klicke einen Mitarbeiter"
The “den” let the reader think, that you have to click on a particiular employee which is not mentioned anywhere.
GDT_Combination
Correct spelling would be
"großartige"
GDT_Contractwork:
Better at this point: “Bezahlung”
GDT_Contractworkoffer:
“ich” is not written capitalized in the middle of a sentence.
GDT_Developmentstage
"Entwicklungsphase" is one word, this affects all the dev.stages
Also, it looks not good that “Ausgewählte Features” is overlapping the costs.
There are some spots where texts are overlapping, which makes it hard to read. Idk if that happens due to having the game in window mode, but it just doesn’t look good.
GDT_EngineReminder:
the circeled word can be removed, it does not belong there or anywhere in the box. Also, a comma is missing after the “Vergiss nicht”
GDT_Gamereport3:
correct spelling would be “großartige” at this point
GDT_Gamereport4:
red marked:
first should be “gut” the other two should be "großartig"
blue marked:
Translation is missing but I have currently no good translation in mind.
If I find something I’ll let you know.
GDT_Gamereport5:
better wording:
"dass “playername” wohl eine Lehrstunde in Sachen Bescheidenenheit braucht,"
and
"Im Großen und Ganzen"
GDT_Gamereport6:
correct spelling: sollten
GDT_Interview: This is what I was talking about above, the “du” is used instead of "Sie"
But just replacing is not fixing it, you also need to change some other words then.
So it would be…
“Was sind Ihre Erwartungen” and “Glauben Sie,”
GDT_LargeBooth:
“Haupthalle” needs to be capitalized
GDT_News:
Correct spelling:
zugrundeliegende
GDT_OldEngine:
The comma behind “Fans” is incorrect
"haben "should be “hat” in this case
- untranslated buttons
GDT_OldEngine1:Okay thats a bigger one…
My suggestion for a correct wording:
“Chef, unsere kürzliche Entscheidung, die Spielengine zu verkaufen, wurde von unseren Fans negativ aufgenommen. Insgesamt haben wir “amount” Fans verloren und einen Gewinn von “amount” gemacht”
GDT_OldEngine2:
Again, my suggestion for a correct wording, since it is nearly the same as above:
“Chef, unsere kürzliche Entscheidung, die Spielengine abzugeben, wurde von unseren Fans positiv aufgenommen. Insgesamt haben wir “amount” Fans gewonnen und einen Verlust von “amount” gemacht”
GDT_Press: I think no further explanation needed
GDT_Press1:
correct writing: "priorisiert"
second should be worded “besonders wichtig für so ein Spiel ist” or “besondere Wichtigkeit für so ein Spiel hat”
GDT_Press2: the first part is okay, but then it starts sounding weird. correct wording after the comma would be "hat “playername” von “gamecompanyname” die sehr mutige Bemerkung gemacht,"
The circeled “was” should be “war” and “übererfolgreich” is an adjective in this case and therefore not written capitalized
GDT_Press3:
suggestion for the part after the first comma: " dass playname besser aufpassen sollte, dass das fertige Produkt vielleicht doch nicht die Erwartungen erfüllt"
GDT_Publishingcontract:
The gamesize is not translated, should be “groß” in this case
GDT_Stereoscopic3D:
correct spelling: Fortschrittliches
GDT_TutorialBoost:
Again no explanation needed
GDT_TutorialBoost1:
Aufladeprozess is one word
GDT_TutorialRDLab:
- benutze die
- comma is not needed there
- the box is in the right lower edge so it would be “rechten unteren Ecke”
That’s it for now,
I hope it helps
Best regards,
Sarah
Let me know if you would like me to post the accompanying images!
