I accept your business request. I look forward to ending the game war.
- Ashton Snapp, Chance Caudill, and John
Around 5 years after the Eclipse Infinite, Ubisoft has announced the āUmagineā. A Wii-styled console, that comes in an assortment of colours, Venetian Wine, Black Onyx, Swampy Marshes, Sky Blue, Sparkling Silver, and the Limited Edition Ubisoft Ultraviolet. It features 2160bit graphics, a 22500bit ACPU, and a state-of-the-art storage drive that Ubisoftās own R&D Lab have created. It comes with a 3-month membership card, and can either download the game directly into the console through UNiverse, or into your PC. It holds 1200 gigs of RAM. The controller, (to try and best the touchscreen) is a sensor that can detect movement; they call this āUSeeā. Alternatively, there is a sleek, user-friendly controller which skin is gel, so you do not suffer from your hands.
For the first 300 people to buy it, they will come home with a āGratifying Goldā Pack, a 2-year membership and the special editions of both Assassinās Creed, and Firenze. They will also receive a T-Shirt, a cap and a signed āPongā game - The first game Ubisoft ever released.
It will be released in two months. They have posted a picture of what it looks like in āSparkling Silverā below:
Thank you for your acceptment. We shall start work immediately.
Contact us by Private Messaging.
If TPS is working on this as well, then shouldnāt it come with some of our games as well?
Also, I would like a shot of what the interface looks like on screen.
Probably, Iāll work on a new game
Company Name: Velvet Corportation
CEO: Gaben Newb
āAt the recent G3 convention we were introduced to a newly emerged company called Velvet Corporation, run by Gaben Newb, a former Micronoft employee who worked on the first versions of the Indows OS. Newb told us that his small team of employees have their own game engine, a heavily modified Quack engine, that they claim is years ahead of anything else in terms of graphics, sound and general gameplay capability. They plan to release their first game on the āSilverSirā engine, Half-Dead, within the next few monthsā
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Ubisoft has officially signed a contract with TPS
(( Nice idea, totally forgot about the engines 
I wonāt copy though
Ubisoft has released the a sequel to Assassinās Creed, which is named Assassinās Creed: Brotherhood.
This game is irreversibly linked to Firenze in which you play a much older, and wiser Ezio Auditore. After Monteriggioni is brutally destroyed by Rodrigo Borgiaās son, Cesare. You travel to Roma, where you free Rome from Cesare. To aid you, you rally a whole brotherhood to your side.
VGN: 10/10 ; While I was blowing up Leonardo da Vinciās war machines I thought about the ratingā¦Nah, I actually didnāt, itās just so fun!
TPS announces that they will start work on a new game engine entitled āTPSourceā. It will boast v90 3D Graphics, Dolts Digital Audio, and all the basics of a video game these days (save game, storyline crap, tutorials, you know)
It is expected to be released in 2 months.
Ubisoft, after much reluctance - ^the promise they made to Velvet Corp is now broken- have started creating the impressive UNreal Engine. This engine will have UD, a super-realistic definition created by Ubisoftās Hardware and R&D Lab. This comes with save game, advanced story-lines, human characteristics - thanks again to our R&D Lab- celebrity voice acting, UHear - another ingenious invention created by the Hardware and R&D Labs. This will not harmfully effect any of the other abilities the UMagine has. It is expected to come out early next year, and available to all in about 20 or so years.
Ubisoft has released a staff uniform shirt, although it is optional to wear it. They have released a Beta Tester shirt as well.
Ubisoft releases a sequel to the sports game FIFA, which received good marks. This game is the first to ever use the new UNreal Engine, featuring real-life soccer players such as Ronaldo Christiano. This time it lets you visit later in soccer history, after the dreadful Munich Air Disaster, where you play Manchester United. You also can play Manchester City and Chelsea. However with the FIFA II: Special Edition Pack, you can play online, and with any team. FIFA II: SEP comes with a signed shirt of your choice of soccer teams. You also receive a special signed soccer ball.
Ubisoft has said that the company now has over 423 M in itās bank account. They also revealed that they will create a Special thing. They have only said that they will likely to benefit largely from this Special thing.
Company Name: Trick or Treaters Inc
Owner: Samuel āTrickā Kessler
Game: Dragonfire
A new company manned by a long time gamer, Trick, they wish to create their own console, as it seems everybody is stuck on the Umagine. They call it the āFairplayā system. The console is already nearly done, and it will be released in stores October 31st, the day of Halloween. The system will come bundled with āDragonfireā. The system also features 2160 bit graphics, but it has a better CPU made by Intel, and it has about 1 petabyte of storage space. Wow. The console also has 1500 gigs of RAM, but the one problem is is that the controller has a very odd style, as it uses 2 analog joysticks and 12 buttons. 12 buttons. Wow. They say they will eventually release an arcade style version of the controller, so thatās relieving. The bundled game is an Action-RPG with incredible graphics that go beyond my imagination. It is similar in style to an old game from the 21st century, Skyrim. It has voice acting from celebrities such as Bill Clintonās Head, Robokor, and the all-star rocker Jimmy Bimmy Davis. Will this topple the Umagine? We will see withing exactly one week. Iām Handsome Tomās Head. Iāll talk to ya later. Oh wait! I forgot to show you guys the console!
And their logo!
Seeya soon.
After months of waiting, with Velvet Co holding off releasing the game to āMake sure they are delivering the best possible productā, Half-Dead has been released as a PC exclusive. The game recieved universal acclaim, with All Games calling it āThe greatest development in gaming since Dinkey Kingā. Much of the praise went to the impressive technology behind its SilverSir engine, which include hi-res graphics, preformance optimisation and skeletal animation. The linear storytelling was also highly praised. Gaben announced that his company will continue to work on the engine to make it the greatest in the industry.
Half-Dead has also attracted a large modding community, so we may see developments from that in the future.
After the success of Half-Dead, Velvet Co have held talks with Ubisoft over porting the game to the UMagine.
āWe will port the game to your console for 5 million. In return, we will offer you 10% of all profits made from Half-Dead games sold on the console. This may sound low but keep in mind that Half-Dead is a very popular game and should help to increase your market share. We may consider making more games for your console and would like to hold talks about that matterā.
In other news, a Half-Dead mod called Counter-Force, a millitary themed mod of the action-shooter game, has been hugely successful, clocking over a million players. Gaben has given the developers jobs at Velvet and over the next few months turns Counter-Force into a full game for the PC. The game was very well received gaining an average of 9.25/10 review score.
Velvets success means they now have over 100Mil in the bank. In addition they have 100 employees now.
Eleven months after the Special Announcement, Ubisoft announces a State-of-the-art Theme park! This modern theme-park looks like the Taipei 101, however it contains many, many thingsā¦ This is large ly based around around Ezio Auditore da Firenze, there will be a free-running platform to practice your skills, as well as a beta testing area - only for previous beta testers. There will be gaming shops everywhere, and of course hundreds of fair games. There will be Museums, Behind-The Stage looks and staff/fan meetings.
Here is what it looks like:
Recent news on the Fairplay! Trick says the console will have built-in internet, running at extreme speeds of 500gb/ps! The internet is absolutely free for the system, so the possibilities of high sales of this system will be incredibly high! One problem with the idea of high sales: it seems Half-Dead wonāt be released for the system! There has been no talk between Trick and Gaben, so it seems this amazing console wonāt have an amazing game! AAAAARRRRGGGGHHHH! Trick says he would like to talk with Gaben about porting it, but the odds are not in Trickās favor. We will see. In other Fairplay news, devs at ToT Inc are working on a game for the Fairplay and PC; Morpheus. It is a Hacking/RPG-Strategy MMO, which will have cross-platform support, so that sounds really cool. Here are some Alpha pics:
And remember kiddos, this stuff is just Alpha content! It will update! The planned price coming from ToT Inc is $11 a month! All your data will be saved if you stop paying, and you can just start paying again under your account, and all your data will be there, and you will be able to hop right back into the quest you were on earlier in the year.
In other ToT Inc news, a new developer called Monote has left the scene. They recently created a simplistic game for the Umagine called BoulderBallDash, a re-hash of the old Mario Party minigame from the Nintendo 64. Not to be confused with the 64th console Nintendo came out with before bankruptcy. The game is basically all about avoiding boulder rolling down the hill while you try to dogde them so you can make it to the top. They were doing very well with sales, so ToT Inc decided to offer them $20 Million for the rights to BoulderBallDash and all their future games. Fans of Monote are promised that almost nothing will be different, else than the fact that they will now release their games for the ToT Fairplay.
Iām Handsome Tomās Head. Iāll seeya soon.
Finally, Trick or Treaters Inc Founder Samuel Kessler has stepped up to Velvet Co owner Gaben Newb and has offered 10 million dollars to him, and 5% of all the profits of Counter-Force on the Fairplay console would go to ToT Inc. He also promises an impressive ad campaign for any Counter-Force DLC in the future. Will Gaben accept Samuelās offer? We will find out soon, hopefully.
In other news, Monote has made a game that has already come out on the PC through physical distribution called Red Army Forces, which seems to be another Militaristic shooter game, but this one is based on history and real events. It is also planned to be released on the Fairplay, but we still wonder how well it will continue to sell, as Ubisoft still has their own digital distro service, and that has reduced the sales of physical copies of games within the past few years. Hopefully, it will survive.
And finally, a company under the name of Rocket Propelled Games is coming out with an RPG for all platforms, and it is called Runeblade. It will be free on all platforms, but the game does have in-app purchases. And with the amazing quality of the game, parents, make sure to keep your credit cards hidden. Your kids will steal them.
Goodbye all. Have some goddamn ANSI art!
